Monday, February 4, 2013

Why I Should Never Be In Charge Of Children's Skits....

So, lately at the youth desk we've been having to come up with some skits to perform for school groups. Most of them are based on children's picture books that we adapt into miniature plays (only about 10 to 15 mins long). I'm relatively new to the youth scene so I'm not down on how exactly you build plays that children are excited to watch and easy to follow.... Here was my attempt whenever one day we discussed word problems...

( Juan has 100 apples, and Marcos wants to buy 1/2 of them. Unfortunately 8% of the apples are rotten and can't be sold. How many apples can Marcos buy from Juan?"


....but then, Marcos gets greedy and whips out his baretta. )

Marcos : Gimme all your apples, pendejo! Load them into the back of my truck.

 ( Juan fears for his life so he complies with Marcos's request. The second Marcos takes off out of the driveway, Juan calls the police. )

Juan: Help! Marcos had me at gunpoint and stole all of my apples!

Police: We are on the scene.

( The police catch up with Marcos's truck and attempt to pull him over. Marcos reaches out the window with his baretta and fires 3 shots finally puncturing one of the police car's tires. )

Police: Firing at an officer is a federal offense! We need backup. Set up a police baracade at 27th and Parker. Vamanos!

( Marcos spots the police line but he can't afford to get caught. He steps on the gas and tries to smash through with his truck.


With no success, Marcos leaps out of the truck and tries to get away with the apples on foot, but he's no match for the police's canine unit. They sniff him out and tackle him to the ground. The police put Marcos in handcuffs and recover the stolen apple. There's some peculiar white powder leaking out of one. The canine unit recognizes it as an illegal substance. They take the apples back to Juan and question --

Police: Sir, were you aware that these apples had vials of cocaine in them?

Juan: No, sir. I had no idea.

Marcos: You liar! You son of a bitch! You knew it. You sell your 'special' apples to me and my compadres all the time.

Police: Have you sold this man your apples before?

Juan: No, sir. I have never seen him.

( Marcos gets thrown into prison. Upon further investigation, Juan is an illegal immigrant and he is deported back to Mexico City. A representative from the Drug Cartel tracks him down and tells him that El Patron is not pleased that Juan messed up on the delivery. Juan pleads for his life, but El Patron makes an example of him and puts a bullet in his head.

Back at the prison, Marcos's wife Esperanza visits her husband in jail -

Esperanza: You selfish pig! You got thrown into prison and now I am left alone to care for our five children all on my own. Why, Marcos, why?

Marcos: Baby, I only wanted to make us rich, and give you everything you ever wanted.

Esperanza: Oh, you stupid man, I was already the richest woman in the world because I was rich with your love. All I ever wanted was you.

Marcos: Oh, Esperanza, what have I done?! I'm so sorry!

........ that's when I got cut off and told that my story might not work ._.

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